2002 WORLD CUP CHAT HIGHLIGHTS - VOL. ONE
Phil and Bill fill their normal roles. Everyone else is everyone else
<Rippa> Where the hell is Cel?
<Rippa> And where the FUCK is Barnwell? lazy bastard
<[Keb]> Rippa - <Bill> ok - I am going to get drunk on Guinness and watch soccer
<[Keb]> <Bill> comfort Rippa with the knowledge that I might be back later
<Rippa> HA!
<Rippa> Barnwell aint ever coming back

<Mr_Pogo> Nigeria has the ballsiest uniforms EVER.
<Rippa> I think you meant to say blinding

<GeoffWessel> the tourney may replace Dr. Funk as my fave Nike campaign of the moment
<Rippa> the tourney is so much better than Dr. Funk
<Rippa> stupid overrated Vince Carter
<GeoffWessel> Rippa: but BOOTSY~!
<Rippa> If I needed a Bootsy fix, I will listen to Groove is in the Heart or something

<JustinLS877> does anyone believe the hype aout the new fevernova ball being juiced?
<GeoffWessel> I heard every goalie hated it
<JustinLS877> yeah same here
<GeoffWessel> too unpredictable
<JustinLS877> I think its a visula thing
<Rippa> Well Jack Edwards will claim it is the ball's fault anytime the US loses

<Rippa> What a sec - Jorge Campos plays for Paraguay now???
<Rippa> or is that a different Jorge Campos?
<Rippa> guess that is a different Jorge Campos
<Rippa> a 2nd Jorge Campos is still confusing me
<Bill> ???
<Bill> there are 2 Jorge Campos???
<Rippa> Yup
<Bill> Yeah - i am very confused now myself

<Rippa> "MY HAIR! MY HAIR REFUSES TO MOVE!"
<Bill> The great thing was...um...one of the Argentine guys
<Bill> I forget who - his hair moved as a whole when he got tackled
<Bill> instead of hair by hair
<Bill> it looked like it was a retractable roof on a stadium shifting or something

<Bill> did Cel ever explain where his whereabouts last night?
<Bill> -where
<Rippa> I didnt see Cel at all tomorrow
<Rippa> yesterday either
<Bill> no wait - I am the drunk one
<Rippa> I can see through time
<Bill> I didnt see Cel at all tomorrow is beautiful

<Digable_James_Cobo> Rippa vs. Bill: Battle of the Strange
<Bill> well - I'm drunk
<Bill> Rippa is naturally this way

<Rippa> you are going to be boozed out in a pool of booze by then
<Bill> boozed out in a pool of booze!
<Bill> uber-redundancy
<Rippa> I really should be drunk - at least that what be an excuse

<Rippa> it is really unsettling to hear the Univision announcers suddenly bellow out "SEAMAN!"

<Rippa> we heard you the first time Jack
<Bill> I think Jack needs to change his pants
<Rippa> if he is wearing them at all
<Bill> ...
<Bill> I didn't need to think that
<Bill> especially at 20 to 6 in the morning

<Rippa> I have watched no ABC coverage but a friend was telling me that the other guy with them will disagree with Wynalda on everything
<Bill> yeah - there is an Italian guy who basically is being the heel color commentator to Wynalda's face PBP guy
<Bill> They don't appear to like each other at all - and they don't have any chemistry
<Bill> The worst part is...I forget who the guy heading the coverage is - but it's someone's brother
<Rippa> John Saunders?
<Bill> oh - Terry Gannon
<Bill> Who is...yes...Rich Gannon's brother
<Bill> http://espn.go.com/abcsports/columns/gannon_terry/bio.html
<Rippa> HA!
<Bill> the best part is his bio says absolutely nothing about soccer
<Bill> He is Nise Jack Edwards - which is so not good
<Bill> at least Edwards calls sumo - this guy's calling card is the little league world series. And being Rich Gannon's brother

<Rippa> my biggest problem with Jack Edwards is his constant trying to justify that soccer is an exciting sport
<Bill> I find it really weird when they try to go over the cap rule for the newbies in each match
<Bill> I'm like - it's 5:30. If you're up watching this you already know what the fuck a cap is

<Rippa> The Turkey keeper looks like the guy from the Mummy
<Bill> He looks like he just got punched in the face
<Bill> meanwhile one of the Turkish strikers looks like he suffers from lupus - and I already mentioned Ronaldinho who's the lovechild of Master P and Marco Etcheverry
<Bill> There are some ugly ugly folks in this match

<Bill> Roberto Carlos is no defender
<Rippa> so he is the Brazilian Jeff Agoos?
<Bill> ooh
<Bill> he's kinda like the Brazilian David Regis - but with the speed to get back - and he actually speaks the language of the national team he plays for

<Bill> oh - you will be happy to know - I used mercurial in a sentence while I was drunk - and it made sense if I remember it correctly
<Bill> I described a loose woman as being "mercurial in her slutiness", sleeping with guys from each of the freshmen halls

<Rippa> HUH???
<Bill> what?
<Bill> HA!
<Rippa> OH MY KNEE! OH, I mean, MY FACE!